Can a Marriage Survive Addiction?
The Impacts of Addiction on a Marriage
Marriage is a special committee that you make during your life. While it’s true that you can’t pick your family, you do have the freedom to decide who it is you will marry. Although it may feel as though you have the perfect match and connection with your significant other, addiction is an example of a disease that could completely destroy and bond that the two of you have. It’s important to remember that addiction can impact a person at any point in their life and it’s something that can ultimately ruin a marriage unless the spouse that is struggling with addiction reaches out for help. Here are a few examples of the negative impacts that addiction to drugs or alcohol can have on marriage:
Trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. However, when a spouse is struggling with an addiction, they may do or say things that they wouldn’t normally do which can cause serious trust issues within the relationship. Once trust is broken, it’s difficult to re-establish this trust which is something that can result in further strife.
Any person that has overcome addiction will tell you that one of the main things that addiction causes is stress. Typically, normal stress is something that a married couple can face together. However, stress that is caused as a result of active addiction can be more difficult to manage and ultimately cause further problems within your relationship.
Feeding an addiction can cost a substantial amount of money. Further, when one or both spouses are so focused on their addiction, it’s possible that they may be spending a tremendous amount of money on drugs or alcohol. Also, the odds of that spouse losing their job as a result of being under the influence of a substance is high which could cause further serious financial struggles.
How to Support an Addicted Spouse
The reality is that there are several ways that you can support your spouse if they have an addiction by taking the following steps:
Participate in family therapy
Family therapy can help you and your spouse to redevelop the relationship that the two of you have with each other. In this neutral environment, you and your spouse can begin to talk about what you can do together to work through the issues that addiction may have caused in your life. Although family therapy may feel difficult at times, ultimately this open and honest communication can be a game-changer when it comes to re-establishing a healthy relationship.
Don’t place unrealistic expectations on yourself or your spouse
It’s critical to recognize that addiction recovery is a process. As a result, it would be unrealistic to expect that your relationship with your spouse will instantly become better overnight. As the addicted spouse begins to work through different aspects of their recovery, it’s possible that you could have good days and bad days in your relationship. However, as long as the two of you have the understanding that the good days will far outweigh the bad, you will realize that you and your loved one are in a much better place in your life overall.
Be willing to listen
Above all, you always need to be willing to listen to each other during this process. During active addiction, it may be all but impossible for the two of you to communicate in a healthy and effective manner. During treatment, you and your spouse will learn the importance of communicating with each other now that both of you are committed to being sober.
Can a Marriage Survive a Drug or Alcohol Addiction?
If you and your spouse are committed to working through an addiction treatment process, then there is always the possibility that your marriage will be able to survive addiction. It’s impossible for a person to “love” an addiction away. Instead, working through addiction takes a high level of commitment, work, and understanding. It’s just as important to realize that there are several things that the addicted spouse will need to address separate and apart from the sober spouse. For instance, there are likely certain traumatic events that the addicted spouse may have experienced in their life that they need to work through before they can truly overcome their addiction. It’s critical that the sober spouse understand this process and have their own system of support so that their marriage can survive addiction.
Is Divorce a Better Option?
It’s important to remember that only you can make the decision as to whether divorce is the better option for you and your spouse. If you are in a position where your spouse is struggling with addiction and has attempted to receive help but you don’t see any improvement, then it may be time to put your best interests first. Keep in mind, however, that this change is not something that comes overnight. Without time, there is always the possibility that your relationship can change and become better and healthier. However, if you’re in a consistently unhealthy and overall toxic environment, then it would certainly be time for you to look into the steps that you can take to remove yourself from it so that you can get to a healthier place in your life.
Remember that if you have struggled with addiction and you have become sober, however, your spouse is still caught in the trap of the same continuous cycle of addiction, then the odds are that you may find yourself struggling with your own addiction and temptations. In a case like this, it’s imperative that you remove this negative influence from your life. The only way for you to do that may be to keep your own sobriety intact is by removing yourself from the situation.
Getting Support for Yourself
You should never overlook the importance of getting help for yourself through these difficult times. There are many spouses that approach addiction recovery as an issue that won’t impact them as long as their spouse isn’t using drugs or alcohol. The reality of the situation is very different. Addiction is something that can have a lingering effect on the sober spouse as well. Feelings of resentment, guilt, or frustration are not uncommon which is why it’s just as important for you to reach out for your own level of help as well.
Over and above family therapy, something that you should consider participating in is Al-Anon or Nar-Anon meetings. While it’s possible that you may have heard of Alcoholics Anonymous meetings or Narcotics Anonymous meetings if a sober spouse were to attend one of these meetings they would probably feel out of place since those meetings were specifically designed to help a person that has suffered from active addiction. Al-Anon or Nar-Anon meetings, on the other hand, were developed as a system of support for friends or family members that have been impacted by another’s addiction. During these meetings, you will have the opportunity to share your stories of hope and experience which can help you on your own journey.
Addiction Treatment at Pacific Manor Recovery
If you or your spouse is suffering from an addiction to drugs or alcohol, help is always available when you reach out to Pacific Manor Recovery. At Pacific Manor Recovery, we provide you with the personalized care and support that you need as you begin to make these crucial changes in your life. Whether you need help in developing a treatment plan to address your addiction or both you and your spouse are struggling with addiction, you can take comfort in the fact that our recovery team will help you through all of your struggles.
Pacific Manor Recovery offers a multitude of treatment options. For example, it’s possible that you may need to start your addiction recovery journey in detox which helps to remove the influence of your drug or drink of choice from your mind and your body. This is a critical and dangerous stage in your addiction treatment. While the sober spouse may feel as though they can properly care for the addicted spouse during this stretch of time, it’s essential that you trust the experienced professionals at Pacific Manor Recovery to help you through this time.
From there, you can transition into a comprehensive addiction treatment program that will help you to truly address your addiction and recover from it. There are many people that decide that they need to remove themselves from the temptations around them by committing to an inpatient program. During an inpatient program, you will live at our facility throughout the course of your treatment journey and have unlimited access to our fantastic amenities and staff. However, if you need more flexibility in your treatment plan, the better option would be an outpatient treatment program. This treatment option allows you to come and go from our facility around your unique schedule. Are you ready to learn more about the treatment plans that we offer and whether we can help your marriage survive addiction? Get in touch with us today at (888) 300-4370.
— Pacific Manor Recovery (@PMRRecovery) January 11, 2022